Feeling Unsupported as a Mom? Is it gaslighting or oversensitivity? Real Mom Support vs Expectations | Matrescence

Have you ever felt unsupported as a mom?

Motherhood is tough, but what makes it even harder is when societal expectations are disguised as support.

If you’ve ever asked yourself, "Am I being too sensitive?" or wondered if you’re overreacting to well-meaning advice, you're not alone.

In this episode of The Parenthood and Relationship Podcast, we’ll talk about the difference between real support and the subtle pressure that often makes moms feel judged, gaslit, and even burdened by mom guilt.

Where do these expectations come from, and how can we start recognizing when advice is more about the other person’s comfort than actual help?

More importantly, how do we stop passing down generational expectations and offer moms the kind of support that truly lightens their load?

🎧 In today’s episode, we explore:

• The emotional toll of societal pressure and how it fuels mom guilt
• How to offer healing support instead of judgment
• Why many moms feel unsupported, even by those closest to them
• The role of past trauma in shaping our expectations of motherhood
• How to recognize when you’re being gaslit versus being too hard on yourself
  
  

If you’ve ever struggled with feeling guilty or unsure whether you're receiving true support, this episode is for you.

We’ll discuss the small yet powerful shifts that can help both moms and those who care about them offer support in a way that truly makes a difference.

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Journaling Exercise

1. If you are a mom who feels gaslit or unsupported

Think about a recent situation where you felt unsupported, judged, or dismissed. Reflect on how the interaction made you feel. Did you second-guess your emotions or decisions? Ask yourself: Were my feelings invalidated, or was I told I was overreacting? How do I usually respond in moments like these, and what impact does it have on my confidence as a mother?

Write down your thoughts and ask yourself:

• "What do I need in moments like this to feel truly supported?"
• "Is there a pattern in how I receive feedback or advice from certain people, and how does that impact my sense of self?"
• "What boundaries can I set to protect my emotional well-being?"

2. If you fear that you may be passing your own trauma as "support"

Reflect on a recent time when you gave advice or support to a mom in your life. Was my advice really what she needed, or did it reflect my own unresolved experiences and fears? Was I trying to validate my own choices by encouraging her to follow my path? How can I better tune into her needs and offer support that honors her journey, not mine?

Write down your thoughts and explore:

• "Am I projecting any of my past struggles or unmet needs onto others?"
• "How can I check in with myself before offering advice to ensure it's about helping her, not validating my own decisions?"
• "What would true, compassionate support look like from her perspective?"

 

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Related Resources and Links

> FREE Self-Connect Calendar
> FREE Guide: Calm Parent Calm Child
> (Re)Discover Your Identity in Motherhood [waitlist]
> Get in touch with me (Instagram; website; e-mail: info@markellakaplani.com)
> Leave a Podcast Review HERE 😀
> FREE Motherhood Coaching Session: Send an e-mail to info@markellakaplani.com with the subject line “Podcast Guesting”
> Join our community on Facebook: Parenthood and Relationship Group

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Find the full transcript HERE.

🎧 Listen, share, and leave a review! Your support means the world!
📲 Follow me on Instagram @markella.kaplani for more insights and updates.
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Markella Kaplani, M.A.
Clinical-Counseling Psychologist
Parenthood & Relationship Coach
Matrescence Coach, Facilitator, & Activist
www.markellakaplani.com